so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
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