im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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