i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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