So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
