Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
