Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
