try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
