Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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