yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
My vagina just clenched in fear
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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