i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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