there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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