At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
