i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
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