Me too!
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
