Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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