I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
