This girl is more easily done than said...
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
