oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
