I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
