i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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