Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We talked him into tasing himself.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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