I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
