just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
