so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
