just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
