this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize