i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize