just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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