people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Randomize