We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
