Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
