Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
