if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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