i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
should my penis look like a turkey
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
