There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
you would pick up someone in the library
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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