I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
