You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
