Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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