: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
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