Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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