I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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