omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
whose parrot is this?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize