Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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