Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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