The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Randomize
