Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize