Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize
