What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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