You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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