I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
look no pants
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
